P2R1 VLCD #11

Hi all you out there!
Today I saw a loss of .6, which is much better than the .2 I was expecting. So that brings the total up to 11.6lbs/10 days of VLCD. I didn't have any beef yesterday, so I'm wondering if that had anything to do with the change in the pattern. I also had none today so we will see what tomorrow brings.

I am still not feeling hungry, and physically I am well. But today I am having some issues about this diet that are emotional in nature. So that's what I'm going to talk about...

First of all, if you know me, you know I eat when I'm happy, sad, bored, stressed, mad, .... the list goes on. Sadly, my reasons for eating are usually anything but true hunger. And this is one of the biggest reasons I find myself here with 60 pounds to lose (well, now about 48... :)

This diet has completely taken away my ability to feed my emotions with food. When I eat, the allowed foods are so limited (and getting a little boring... sorry chicken!). All the food is healthy and in reasonable portions. I can't eat past 7pm. The food I am eating is only serving one purpose... feeding my body with nutrition it needs.

When I eat in response to emotion, I rarely choose healthy food in reasonable portions. And I certainly don't observe time constraints under those circumstances. Tonight, I am sitting in a class that I have no more energy for (I have been in class for 5 hours and 15 minutes, with 45 more minutes to go! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGG!) My knee jerk reaction is to grab something to eat to alleviate my boredom and circumvent being tired. Someone brought a cake, another person brought pizza for everyone, there are donuts.... the list goes on. (Apparently, many others in this class have some of the same issues)... Of course, I am not going to eat any of that. In fact, I am not going to eat anything else tonight because the diet tells me I am done for today, and truly, I am not even hungry.

Bottom line is, this diet is forcing me to live without the comfort and companionship of food. It does not allow me to engage in emotional eating. While I am struggling with this aspect, I think it is very good for me. I want to use this time to analyze and figure out what my relationship with food should look like, and to think about how I can make the needed changes for the long term.

But still, I am feeling kind of sad, like I am missing a good friend.

Sorry if that's kind of depressing. But that's where I'm at today!
More later....